Eyes, hear

Drops nakhi ne em lagtu thu ke taara gaal par kissey kar do par su karu mummy hata ne.

Itli pyaari lage che elne aam itlu innocently sunave che.

Form

"Today is the 14th.. So call them after a week on 21st."
"Yeah I have written it on my board. Call them between 20th and 22nd."
Me: *laughs frantically*
"Ya.. I  know... We are opposites, right?"
"I said call on 21st. You said between 20th and 22nd. What's between 20th and 22nd? 21st!!!"
Hahahhahahahaha

Ego

For a stranger, an apology doesn't mean anything. They are just words.

For him, an apology would mean putting himself down in front of you, in front of a stranger. He is his ego. So if his ego dies, he dies.

Hold on

*phone randomly goes on hold*

"Why did my phone go on hold?"

"Oh you put me on hold? How could you?"

"How could I put you on hold Naky? My life holds on to you."

Just another telephone conversation.

Prayers

In between all the moments where we may not speak, just know, I always talk to God about you.

- D Ryan

Why are you so sensitive?

I'm not sensitive... I'm specific.

16th January, 2017

Mom: "Are you happy?"
Me: Yes.

Mufi: "Are you sure?"
Me: Yes.

Chocolate energy bites

The bite you made me taste was amazing man. 

Rights

"It doesn't matter what they think, I find you handsome."
*jokingly * "I don't even care what you think, what will I care about what they think?"
*stern voice * "So my opinion doesn't matter to you?"
"It does."
"Good. It should."
"Kyu rag kar diya?"
"Haq hai."
"Woh toh hai."

Distance

I hope time doesn't ruin such beautiful memories.

I hope so too.

We'll hang in.

You know, I like you 100 times better in person than on the phone.
I don't know if it's a good thing or a bad thing.
But come to think of it, we met and fell in love.
And then there's this large gap of us just talking on the phone.
It's all a blur.

It's like we're perfect in person and broken on the phone.

The sad part is, we are going to stay apart for a long time now.

I know man. That's gonna be our test.

I hope we get through it.

Struggle it out in the hope of a new beautiful future.

I hope you don't forget this. How it feels to be with each other.

Appreciation

I love you more than the first day we met.
The way you care about people.
The way you do things with elegance and kindness.
The way you understand things and then do them, even In deen
I admire you, lady.
I must have done something good sometime, to have ran into you.

I feel the same way. Sometimes I think to myself that I haven't even done any good.. Do I even deserve you?
Why is maula being so kind to me and giving me so much?

I should be the one asking that to myself. You're an amazing person.

You're the one who is amazing. And I'm lucky to have met you.

I'm broken.

You're perfect to me.

Cry

Em na hoi ke tume mumin ne utlu boli dao ke ehna aakh ma si aasu aavi jai.. Agar em thai toh khuda ehne lakda ni misaal cheele lese

And he said, "Arre maine toh tujhe kya kya bola hai. Mera kya hoga?"

I said, "I forgive you. It's only for those who aren't forgiven.. I guess."
Secretly, I'm glad he realized it again and thought of me.

Because I thought of him too.. But I crossed my heart and said I forgive him, I forgive him, I forgive him repeatedly.

Love yourself

I am so excited for the things that will be coming in my life.

What I needed to hear

What Niyati told me:
1. It's too early for you to ask him to get married. He's just a junior who hasn't even started his life.
2. Enjoy the time you have without thinking about your future. See if your relationship can stand through distance.
3. When you find someone you can connect with, reassess your situation with him. He's given you an open relationship with no commitment. If he's still unsure, leave.
4. Don't repulse him by bringing up marriage.

Marriage. Stahp.

Here's another reality check post:

1. Some things aren't in your control. Chill.

2. When the time is right, things will work out. Trust the process.

Reality checks

I love recollecting the times when he used to say - We'll stay together, forever. We'll defy all odds. Ours will be a love marriage.

I had never thought I would have someone to see my future with. He's my first. He made me dream and everything is so perfect in my imagination.

Our song

I'm not yours, and you're not mine
But we can sit and pass the time
No fighting wars, no ringing chimes
We're just feeling fine

One hour, forty minutes.

Today's conversation was amazing at so many levels. We were just getting to know each other. It was plain awesome.

In a very long time, I think, I've had intellectual conversations with someone. Our conversations are so thought provoking. Talking to him is a breath of fresh air.

I just want to remember the whole of it someday and be awestruck by what we said to each other. So I'm just going to write the things we talked about for my reference. They may not make sense to the reader. But then again, no one reads this blog anyway.

Happy

"I didn't make any friends in Dubai. I just wander off and see places all by myself when I don't have company."

Masturbation

Today, 14th November 2015, him & I had an argument.

I ignorantly said something. He criticized me so harshly for it. It was very intimidating.

"I get it, okay? Can you please stop now?"
I was afraid to speak anything else.

The silence was broken by his words but I am just caught up on how he spoke to me.